Tonight I struggle with everything...period! I can't even tell you what I struggle with today, but I can tell you I may turn on you any minute. I get to work and I'm fine, the morning wasn't bad but yet the sound of every ones voice grated on my nerves...I out my head down and just work and try to block out the noise, then the voices in my head are screaming at me! I cannot win.
I leave the office at 2pm and talk to myself the entire way about the stupidity of the human race in general. How do people dive this badly? Couldn't you figure out how the directional worked? Listen you little cowboy...don't ride my ass I've been driving longer then you've been alive. Lady, did you get your license out of a cracker jack box? God help me!
The highlight of my day was when I picked Danny up at school only to find out he was in trouble again for screwing around on the bus. The second he spots me he knows there's trouble...his father was supposed to get him! So here I am, sitting in the hallway AGAIN waiting to talk to the principal...like a troubled child myself. I go in and tell him, "I know I know...positive reinforcement" It's getting really hard to praise Danny when he is always in trouble..."can't you just beat him and be done with this?" I remember seeing kids being hit by the nuns in grade school and I was scared shit less...I would NEVER act up for fear that would be me.
So home we go for a little down time before scouts...this will be our last den meeting for the year so we had a pizza party. All in all it was a good night topped off with Danny, Ryan and I going out for DQ afterwards. Now the boys are watching the Yankees and I am watching Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives reruns on Food Network while eating Twizzlers.
It's my lot in life...it's not a lot, but its my life!
Happy Friday XXXOOO
Sunny Spot
Friday, May 28, 2010
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Peanut butter, Summer and Memorial Day
Who loves peanutbutter? I do, more then I like to admit. I like it on Ritz crackers, celery, bananas, apples, english muffins, toast, bread off a spoon and with grape jelly. Why am I going on about peanutbutter? Well yesterday I opened a fresh jar and the smell stuck with me. It always reminds me of summers, we ate TONS of peanutbutter because it was very versitile to serve by the pool. I love the smell when you first open the jar, but it never quit smells the same after.
I miss my childhood summers...the totally lazy days, you got up when you wanted...ate whatever, whenever...did what you wanted with in reason and went to bed when you were tired. The next morning you get up and do it all again...(sigh) where did my youth go?
Last night I was out with Danny and the dogs and you could hear the kids playing and smell someone bbqing burgers for dinner. It was a very warm night, the kind you loved as a kid beacuse back in those days we stayed out until it was time for bed because it was too hot in the house. Now we have central air and when it is too hot outside we seem refuge in the house.
With Memorial Day on us let's not forget all those who have and do serve our country to keep us the home of the free and the brave. When you are at the BBQ or sitiing out with friends, raise a glass and say a prayer for our soldiers...they are the reason we have a future.
XXXOOO
I miss my childhood summers...the totally lazy days, you got up when you wanted...ate whatever, whenever...did what you wanted with in reason and went to bed when you were tired. The next morning you get up and do it all again...(sigh) where did my youth go?
Last night I was out with Danny and the dogs and you could hear the kids playing and smell someone bbqing burgers for dinner. It was a very warm night, the kind you loved as a kid beacuse back in those days we stayed out until it was time for bed because it was too hot in the house. Now we have central air and when it is too hot outside we seem refuge in the house.
With Memorial Day on us let's not forget all those who have and do serve our country to keep us the home of the free and the brave. When you are at the BBQ or sitiing out with friends, raise a glass and say a prayer for our soldiers...they are the reason we have a future.
XXXOOO
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Bitchy Blog
I want to apologize for my last, very angry blog...I meant EVERY word of it, but I shouldn't take it out on all of you. I find myself in this funk from time to time, but it has never lasted this long and it bothers me a lot to feel this way. I am sorry for my rant, I will try and be more sensitive in the future.
In the mean time my house continues to fall around me and the flowers in my garden are dying...why do I feel all these things are a sign? I felt such dispair yesterday that I actually went online to see what job options were in Charlotte, NC and what rentals would take pets...amazingly enough there are plenty of both! That made me feel better...now to get the money pit sold and my bags packed.
In happier news, the first half of my travel for this year is complete and I made a lot of great contacts in MA last week. I have been working on getting all my ducks in a row so we can sell, sell, sell! Things at work are busy which I am grateful for, without work I would have nothing to look forward to. Believe it or not this is the only place I can get some peace and quiet!
Cannot wait for the Memorial Day weekend to start...have to prep our scouts to march in the parade at our Friday Den Meeting. Planning a menu for the weekend in my head and planning on hitting a Skyhawks vs. Jackels game on Saturday afternoon. What are you doing? Whatever it is I hope you enjoy the beautiful weather!
Happy Tuesday XXXOOO
In the mean time my house continues to fall around me and the flowers in my garden are dying...why do I feel all these things are a sign? I felt such dispair yesterday that I actually went online to see what job options were in Charlotte, NC and what rentals would take pets...amazingly enough there are plenty of both! That made me feel better...now to get the money pit sold and my bags packed.
In happier news, the first half of my travel for this year is complete and I made a lot of great contacts in MA last week. I have been working on getting all my ducks in a row so we can sell, sell, sell! Things at work are busy which I am grateful for, without work I would have nothing to look forward to. Believe it or not this is the only place I can get some peace and quiet!
Cannot wait for the Memorial Day weekend to start...have to prep our scouts to march in the parade at our Friday Den Meeting. Planning a menu for the weekend in my head and planning on hitting a Skyhawks vs. Jackels game on Saturday afternoon. What are you doing? Whatever it is I hope you enjoy the beautiful weather!
Happy Tuesday XXXOOO
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Dirty Jersey and the reason it's time to go
For the last year we have talked about getting out of NJ and starting our lives in a warmer climate. I can name 10 reasons I dislike living here and lately I can probably find 50 more if asked. Today I am going to lay out the main reasons why it's time to go...
1) I don't like the winters. It's too cold and we have had way too much snow. I like the change of seasons, but cannot take too many more winters here.
2) The house we bought is too small and falling down around us....I refuse to put more money into this pit, I may resort to playing with fire.
3) If I want to get anywhere I have to drive a minimum of 40 minutes to get anywhere. With the exception of the grocery store which still takes 15 minutes.
4) Molly doesn't like the cold either. If it's below 50 degrees she shivers when she goes out.
5) I need to live in a neighborhood where the kids are well behaved and don't scream constantly.
6) I would prefer to live someplace where a rooster DOES NOT crow into our bedroom windows at 6:30am on Saturday morning.
7) I would like to have social neighbors that I like. We have 4 neighbors that we like, the rest can rot in hell. It's not like I haven't tried, I've thrown block parties and tried to get the neighbors to know one another, drink and be happy...these people suck!
8) My son is an only child and needs other kids to play with.
9) I would like to live nearer a beach so that I can walk it when the weather is cool and lay on it when the weather is warm....sand makes me happy
10) Our trash neighbors are bringing down the value of my home and the police are here at all hours...I cannot live like this anymore. I do not want my son to grow up thinking the police showing up is normal...because it's not!
I am beyond exhausted with these living conditions. I live in a small neighborhood where we should all look out for one another, not be forced to watch the welfare families kids because the mother cannot be bothered. Yesterday I was all but reduced to tears over this and cannot stand the fact I cannot even enjoy sitting out on my patio anymore because this is not the place I want to live anymore.
Happy Sunday All XXXOOO
1) I don't like the winters. It's too cold and we have had way too much snow. I like the change of seasons, but cannot take too many more winters here.
2) The house we bought is too small and falling down around us....I refuse to put more money into this pit, I may resort to playing with fire.
3) If I want to get anywhere I have to drive a minimum of 40 minutes to get anywhere. With the exception of the grocery store which still takes 15 minutes.
4) Molly doesn't like the cold either. If it's below 50 degrees she shivers when she goes out.
5) I need to live in a neighborhood where the kids are well behaved and don't scream constantly.
6) I would prefer to live someplace where a rooster DOES NOT crow into our bedroom windows at 6:30am on Saturday morning.
7) I would like to have social neighbors that I like. We have 4 neighbors that we like, the rest can rot in hell. It's not like I haven't tried, I've thrown block parties and tried to get the neighbors to know one another, drink and be happy...these people suck!
8) My son is an only child and needs other kids to play with.
9) I would like to live nearer a beach so that I can walk it when the weather is cool and lay on it when the weather is warm....sand makes me happy
10) Our trash neighbors are bringing down the value of my home and the police are here at all hours...I cannot live like this anymore. I do not want my son to grow up thinking the police showing up is normal...because it's not!
I am beyond exhausted with these living conditions. I live in a small neighborhood where we should all look out for one another, not be forced to watch the welfare families kids because the mother cannot be bothered. Yesterday I was all but reduced to tears over this and cannot stand the fact I cannot even enjoy sitting out on my patio anymore because this is not the place I want to live anymore.
Happy Sunday All XXXOOO
Monday, May 10, 2010
Whirlwind, trouble and mute
So it's been a while, right? Well with me it's always something...too many commitments, not enough time! Well let's start at the beginning, last time I was here we were enjoying our trip to TN and coming home with a new puppy....meet Molly!
She's cute, isn't she? Don't let her fool you, she is as bad as she is cute. She and Abby have become a pair to be reckoned with. What one doesn't think of the other one does, it's been a fun adjustment. I won't even tell you about the destruction that led up to us purchasing a crate that is all but bent like you see in the cartoons! We've taken to keeping dawgdini in her crate with zip ties...no not zip tying her to the crate, but keeping her from escaping by zip tying key escape routes. They are cute together and have become the best of friends, they even spoon when no one is looking.
In other news, Danny finally made his First Communion...he was so happy! He even agreed to take a picture with me AND smile!
We had a perfectly beautiful day and luckily we took the 11am Mass and not the 1pm, because it was 90 degrees by lunchtime. We had a luncheon at the Greenwood Lake Airport, there is a restaurant up there called the Passport Cafe' that was taken over by the new owners last August...go see them if you are in the area, best food EVER!!! Note they are only open for breakfast and lunch...but tell them I sent you! Better yet, if you are around the weekend of May 22nd and 23rd go for breakfast and stay for the flying and cruising festival, as well as, the battle of the bands. I don't know who is going to be playing, but it should be a lot of fun!
Last week I got a call from school about Danny's behavior both at school and on the bus. It seems that my son has been having issues on the bus for a while now and they finally suspended him for a week. I, in turn, am stuck driving him to and picking him up from school everyday...boy is he in a boatload of trouble! I made him bag up all his toys with the exception of 1 set of legos and 3 books. In addition he has no TV, no video games and has 1 hour of outside play time during the week. He cannot go to scouts or baseball unless he has had a good day at school and continues to behave at home. So far so good....I even have him writing, " I will not misbehave at school or on the bus" in a steno book until it is full, that fills up some of that free time in the evenings.
On Saturday I cleaned the house and sorted seasonal clothes. The wind picked up in the afternoon and the pollen was so thick you could see it....I couldn't stand to sit outside. I spent most of the day with a horrible headache and a scratchy throat. Needless to say I woke upon Sunday horrible hoarse and by mid day I was near mute. It doesn't seems to be getting any better!
Should I touch of Mother's Day? Do you really want to hear? It's not pretty by any means...but you asked for it! The day started out well, we got up had coffee, Danny gave me my last gift (they arrived a few at a time and couldn't wait to be given) and I wanted to go see my friends at the airport for breakfast...so we went. Everything was great! We opted to leave Molly out of her crate since we were only going to be an hour or so, MISTAKE!!! The dogs ripped apart numerous things, nothing of importance or value, but it was a frigging mess! One of the casualties was the blind in the living room window over the couch...it was beyond repair so we opted to head to Home Depot and pick one up among other things. On the way down Ryan asked me what I wanted for dinner that night. I proceeded to tell him I didn't want to have to shop for, prepare or clean up after this meal. He said he "wouldn't think of it"...but guess what? He did think of it, and I did all 3 of the things I do everyday on MOTHERS DAY...boy was I pissed! And to boot, God deemed me mute on this day of all days.
Happy Monday All XXXOOO
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